It’s an odd feeling, sometimes, to stop and consider the fact that I’ve lived three decades. Decade—that D word seems so weighty. Yet it’s a shock to my system that I’m an adult. I don’t feel like an adult! Sometimes I get little reminders, though, of my status of adulthood; and, sometimes those reminders are actually kinda cool.
I’m thinking of my trip a couple of weeks ago to my alma mater, NMT. One of the truly cool things I get to do is participate as a member of the corporate advisory board for the Technical Communication program. This year I had a powerful reminder of why my participation means so much to me. Sitting with a student discussing his resume and portfolio, I made a suggestion that lit him up. It was one of those “ah-ha!” moments, and he left so excited that I couldn’t help but be excited too. Moments like that make me feel like I’m depositing some funds in my karma account. A moment like that changed my life ten years ago.
In February 1998 I attended the STC Region 5 conference in Ft. Worth. We piled five of us into my little Honda Civic and drove from Socorro to Ft. Worth. What a drive that was! Five of us from very different backgrounds, in different places in life, and the only thing we argued about in 15 hours on the road was the proper font for headings—serif or sans-serif? :) LOL, good times.
But that weekend changed my life forever. There were a lot of little things leading up to it, but that weekend was a turning point. Attending the presentations and talking to professionals in my chosen field showed me, more powerfully than I ever could have imagined, that I was holding myself back. For so long (for so many reasons) I considered myself sub-par. I’m not sure why or how I had convinced myself that I would never amount to anything, but that weekend I finally saw how wrong I was. I was good at my profession, and I enjoyed my profession. My self-imposed mold was shattered. I had found a calling, but more importantly, I had rediscovered my worth.
So much changed after that, and some of it was very painful, but I don’t know where I’d be if I hadn’t had that experience. That’s why being able to show these talented students that they are good at what they do is so important to me.
Great story and a great lesson to learn - but never consider yourself sub-par, even if you’re not yet achieving as much as you hope to. And the part about “the shock of adulthood” - that never ends. I’m probably twice your age, and I still find myself wondering when I’m going to grow up!
Never underestimate yourself. Life is too short for “sub-par” thoughts. As for growing up — well, my motto is “growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional”. I rather like it here in my perpetual 19 yr. old world!